Sunday, June 12, 2005

We're Number One!

I have been following with great interest the Christian haters across this great country as they one by one tear down every visage of Christian symbology. Frankly these miserable excuses for human beings make me ill. In the name of some spurious belief that the U.S. constitution calls for a separation of church and state they have been successful in getting the courts to order the removal of everything from small plaques bearing the Ten Comandments to the giant cross on Mt. Soledad in San Diego.

"We the people" has no meaning to these intolerant athiests. In city after city the will of the locals has been ignored. The cross in San Diego has been the subject of numerous stories and debates in the national dialogue. President Bush has even gone to bat for the preservation of the Soledad Cross. Commentator Michelle Malkin has used it as one more example of how the ACLU and the athiests are winning despite massive public support for this and other historic monuments. Apparently athiests and non-believers are offended and scarred for life by the mere sight of these symbols of our overwhelmingly Christian heritage.

So I've been thinking... Wouldn't it be interesting to see if I (little 'ol me) could force the great city of St. Paul and US Bank to remove the giant #1 sign that sits atop the First National Bank Building in downtown St. Paul?

After all I am offended by this arrogant symbol that is clearly meant to impart that everything else is second class. If all the buildings can't be number one then none of them should be. What kind of lesson is this to "the children" - that it's OK to run around beating your chest that your better than everyone else? What about citizens of all the other cities that do not have a giant "one" on one of their buildings, surely they feel inferior to St. Paulites. I am ashamed when friends visit my city and see this arrogant display of machismo flashing oh so proudly above the city.

In reality the giant flashing #1 is a cry for attention. St. Paul plays second fiddle in the national spotlight to its sister city, Minneapolis. Indeed, Minneapolis is a larger city in every respect, more population, taller buildings and most important, home to all the big leauge sports teams. (I do not count the NHL as big leauge and nor should you). So, whenever the Twin Cities area is the focus of a national story or point of interest it is Minneapolis not St. Paul that is mentioned. This makes the giant flashing #1 even more offensive as it is a symbol of our inferior self-image as a big city. I want it taken down!

The question is, if I were to get a lawyer and file a complaint with these charges would I be taken seriously? Probably not, at least not by the fine people in the city of St. Paul and surrounding area. However, I believe I could get a whole wagon full of activists and even a judge or two who would rule in my favor and down it would come. I would stand smuggly before the cameras on the courthouse steps declaring that it now safe to view the skyline once again.


Timothy Birdnow said...

Perhaps that giant 1 is a theocratic attempt to force Pantheism down everyone`s throats! What is the number one? It symbolizes the oneness of everything, the unity of all things as part of God or Brahma. How dare they force us to look at this symbol of their Eastern Mysticism! Seperation of Church and State demands it`s immediate removal!

Anonymous said...

You should actually read the United States Constitution. It actually does specifically separate the State from any churches. And not just in the first two amendments, either. It is specific in several places. Like I say, perhaps you should take the time to read it. The Consititution actually doesn't mention the number One, though. That's actually fine.